ALERT: Time traveling fugitive on the loose

A man claiming he’s from the future was arrested for trying to sabotage the Large Hadron Collider in Switzerland. The advanced physics laboratory explores the behavior of atomic particles and the origins of the universe. Some fear it will cause the end of the world, but that’s just silly.


The man from the future was attempting to disrupt deliveries of Mountain Dew to the facility, in hopes that a chain reaction of events would cause the collider to cease function. The story is pretty interesting and leads one to the conclusion that this is just a troubled young man.


The man was arrested, admitted to a mental hospital and then POOF, he DISAPPEARS one night. No one knows where he is. A friend sent this item to me and asked if the guy has showed up at the advanced physics laboratory located deep in the Soudan Underground Mine here on the Iron Range. I happen to think we should keep our eyes open.


  1. Is there any way we can send this guy back in time to buy up a mess of Chun King stock?

  2. I just got this a week or two ago, but note the original posting date.

  3. Ah, yes. I see now. Well, fortunately for this situation time is a very relative concept. Indeed, whether this gentleman shows up in Soudan may not be a matter of *when* but *at which speed.*

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