It’s time for Squatch Chat at Effie tavern

An image from the “SquatchHERS” website

The legend of an elusive forest beast, more man than ape, spans cultures around the globe. We call him Bigfoot, or Sasquatch, Yeti or the Abominable Snowman. North American native peoples call him “Big Brother,” and think of him as a resident of another time or dimension, come to check on us.

But you can’t escape the fact that no one has properly documented him. I’m left wondering if he didn’t just shave himself down 100 years ago, marry a Swedish girl from town, and become the kind of strong, silent husband so idealized in Northern Minnesota.

An old woman’s journal might read as follows:

“Papa didn’t say much. No one really knew where he came from. But we always had food on the table and lots of inexplicable fur in our drain. Mama smiled a lot.”

But then again, maybe we just aren’t looking hard enough. You’ve probably heard about TV shows like “Finding Bigfoot,” depicting excitable men devoid of gainful employment chasing ambiguous sounds and footprints through the woods.

Many of these shows lack women, however. We’d need to consult a sociologist as to why that might be. But, to save time, perhaps we could simply assume that women are less inclined than men to clomp through the woods looking for a hairy ape-man who might not be there. After all, many of them clomped through the woods to find their current husbands, often just as hairy and thoroughly disappointing in the long run.

But that’s changing. One local female-led Sasquatch research group is on the lookout for cryptids like Bigfoot.

Do you like puns? If not, please leave now.

They go by the name “SquatchHERS,” and they’ll be holding a “Squatch Chat” public meeting at the Neighborhood Tavern in Effie this Saturday, March 2 at 5 p.m.

Living not so far from there, I can attest that this is a good spot for the meeting, if only because it’s one of the few places in the region where Sasquatch might wander through the front door and order a beer. Where did Sasquatch find those overalls? Why does Sasquatch have such strong opinions about a Mexican border wall? We may never know.

I kid, just a little. To be truthful, I’ve met many people who honestly feel that there are Sasquatch out there in the woods of Northern Minnesota. And what they lack in proof, they amplify in conviction.

So, if you’d like to join the conversation, or ladies, if you’d like to be a SquatchHER yourself, you’ve got Saturday plans near the intersection of Highways 38 and 1.

Watch for deer.

And Sasquatch.


  1. Too funny! Now I’m wondering what kind of beer the Sasquatch in the bar orders, tap, Bud Lite or a microbrew.

  2. I know these ladies when they first started, they run on fact base evidence. They are the real researchers not Bigfiit Hunters that some groups are. Keep it going ladies and be safe!

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